I Spoke Too Soon

Another “Playtime” session a complete disaster. It’s not that I hate little kids, I just hate “playing” with them for 45 minutes using a language they don’t understand and receiving no feedback but still under the scrutiny of the Chinese teachers who are probably thinking to themselves (and each other, out loud) what a complete idiot I am.

The second class’s teacher is pretty much horrible. I can feel her giving me Looks. I know she’s thinking, why do we get the Asian-looking teacher? Where’s my blond hair blue eyed FOREIGN teacher? Just about every game I suggest she says it’s too difficult for the children. Dallas (another SES teacher ... who is white) was able to get his teacher to agree to dividing the class into two halves and doing two 20 minutes sessions instead of the one big group for 45 minutes session. Which makes so much more sense. I tried it with my first Playtime class today and at the end of the lesson, the teacher told me that she didn’t think it was a good idea because it was too short a session for each child and the parents would complain because they were paying money for the lessons. I’m thinking that if I had been a white person suggesting this, she would accept this idea because “the white, foreign teacher said it would be a good idea.” But no, I’m just a young, Asian girl who probably doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Because I’m Asian, they are more okay with saying “no” to me. Because then, they are not really offending anyone international.

I feel like it is time for me to talk with Cristina about these Playtime sessions. I always leave those sessions so depressed.

edit: New perspective. I took another look at the schedule and I really can’t complain. I have one of the nicer schedules. I am not commuting too much and I do not have to have random layovers at the office except on Thursday (and assuming my HS classes are canceled forever). I am stationed at one school basically, so that is “my” school. I just need to learn how to work better with the little pre-schoolers. Why couldn’t they all be super-brains so that I could have philosophical debates with them? In English, of course.